Affair Counseling
& Betrayal
Recovery

When trust is shattered by an affair or betrayal, every moment counts. Our EFT trained therapists specialize in helping couples through the deepest wounds with a roadmap for long-term recovery. Led by author, trainer, and owner Jennine Estes Powell, MFT.

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Understanding the Wound: When Secrets Break Everything

Our therapists bring advanced training and a deep commitment to helping couples restore intimacy, rebuild trust, and foster emotional growth. We use Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Attachment Injury Repair Model to help you repair injuries and heal the trust.

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“Every move counts when couples are in high distress.” Jennine Estes Powell, LMFT — Help for High-Conflict Couples

Common Challenges When Rebuilding Trust

Trust isn’t restored with an apology; it’s earned over time. It is earned back, brick by brick, choice by choice. And the trauma from betrayal makes even the calmest person react in ways they never thought they were capable of.

Some common problems we help when dealing with an affiar:

Communication Problems

Unrepaired betrayals cause high-conflict situations.

Couples with an unrepaired affair or betrayal creates cracks in the foundation of a relationship. This fuels high-conflict. Communication errodes when the security is broken.

Communication is altered when needing to trust.

You’re unsure how to get through to your partner about what you need to feel safe, which then causes a disconnect. You end up feeling on

Trust Issues

Broken Trust = Words lost value.

When trust is broken, your partner’s words lose value and you don’t believe what they say. If they say they went to the grocery store, you might second guess it. You review the history of the relationship with a microscope and question the sencerity of it. You feel on edge and can’t believe the day-to-day events are safe.

Feeling stuck in destructive patterns with your partner.

The cycle of fighting, making up, and falling back into conflict seems never-ending.

Dwindling Intimacy

Emotional intimacy is gone or deeply diminished.

You feel disconnected and alone in the relationship, even when things appear fine on the surface.

You notice you and your partner are having less physical intimacy.

Concerns about avoiding a “dead bedroom” are becoming more prevalent.

Broken Trust and Safety

The traumatic experience is changing the way you connect with each other.

Betrayals and attachment injuries cause trauma, creating an emotional distance that makes reconnecting difficult. Your body is on high-alert, hypervigelent, and in survival mode.

Stay or Leave: Unsure what to do.

Betrayal has deeply hurt your relationship, leaving one partner uncertain of how to trust again and the other unsure of how to rebuild it. The question of, “do I stay or go” passes by often, causing you or your partner distress.

Emotional
Benefits

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benefits of How Counseling can help you transform your relationship.

Clients who participate in affair couples counseling can leave with:

Rebuilding trust and confidence
a deeper emotional bond
understanding of the wound and how to prevent future injuries.

Rebuild Trust and Emotional Connection in Your Relationship

Through Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) techniques, couples work to rebuild trust, improve emotional security and restore lost bonds. This process encourages healing and lays the groundwork for a more trusting, fulfilling relationship.

Strengthen Communication and Understanding with Your Partner

In couples therapy, partners learn strategies to express their feelings and needs clearly. It reduces misunderstandings and conflicts while deepening their understanding of each other.

Develop Healthy Conflict Resolution Skills for Long-Term Harmony

Couples therapy equips partners with practical tools for resolving conflicts constructively. By learning healthier approaches to handling disagreements, couples can experience lasting harmony and reduced relationship tension.

Overcome Trauma and Emotional Barriers Together

For couples dealing with trauma, therapy offers a supportive space to work through emotional barriers together. By healing as a unit, couples strengthen their bond and emerge more resilient.

Prevent Divorce by Addressing Underlying Relationship Issues

Unresolved issues can lead to a relationship’s breakdown. By tackling these root causes, therapy helps prevent divorce and fosters a renewed sense of connection.

Create a Stronger, Healthier Relationship Foundation

Couples therapy provides the opportunity to create a healthier foundation for your relationship. Therapy allows couples to move forward with confidence and trust.

Improve Intimacy and Emotional Responsiveness

Therapy helps couples improve their emotional responsiveness and physical intimacy, creating a more satisfying relationship.

Gain Tools for Maintaining Commitment and Connection

In couples therapy, partners learn essential tools for maintaining long-term commitment and connection. These strategies help couples navigate tough times while staying emotionally connected.

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Hear from Couples and Individuals Who Found Healing with Us

What people are saying

“As a fellow therapist, I can say that I truly admire Emily’s approach with her clients. She’s incredibly gifted at using her training in EFT to work with couples as well as those with trauma backgrounds. She’s also uniquely skilled at balancing validation and encouraging her clients towards challenging growth. I cannot recommend her enough!”

– Sarah Bussey

“Spokane Counseling Hub is the go-to place for couples therapy, individual therapy and trauma therapy in Washington state!! It is owned by Jennine Estes, who is a well known author, speaker, trainer, mentor and therapist. I am a LMFT who has referred many clients here, and I know they are in good hands. They also offer telehealth, so if you are not located in Spokane, you can still get amazing quality care here anywhere in Washington state!! If you are in need of relationship therapy, couples therapy, individual counseling, personal growth, attachment counseling – this is your place!!”

– Jackie Wielick

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Why Spokane Counseling Hub Stands Out

Expertise, Experience, and Empathy

Spokane Couples Counselor Emily Gilmartin

Emily deTar Gilmartin

More About Emily

Meet Emily deTar Gilmartin

Emily deTar Gilmartin is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor Associate with a Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy from Gonzaga University. With 15 years of experience counseling individuals and couples in five different countries, Emily brings a unique perspective to her couples therapy work at Spokane Counseling Hub. Throughout her career, she has observed a common, universal longing in people—the deep desire to trust and connect in their relationships.

Emily is incredibly skilled at helping couples rebuild that trust and emotional bond. Through her expertise in EFT, she guides them toward lasting change. If you’re looking for compassionate support from someone who truly understands the complexities of relationships, Emily is here to help you navigate the journey.

Jennine Estes

More About Jennine

Meet Jennine Estes Powell

Jennine Estes Powell, LMFT, is not only the owner and supervisor of Spokane Counseling Hub but also a nationally recognized leader in couples and relationship counseling. Co-author of the acclaimed book Help for High-Conflict Couples, Jennine is certified in EFT and trained in EMDR, making her highly qualified to support couples dealing with trauma, conflict, and disconnection.

Beyond her private practice, Jennine mentors and supervises Associate Marriage and Family Therapists, helping shape the next generation of therapists. Her extensive experience and dedication to couples therapy make her invaluable for couples seeking real, sustainable growth in their relationships.

How Our Couples Therapy Works:
A Path to Healing and Growth

At Spokane Counseling Hub, our couples therapy approach is rooted in EFT, a proven method for helping partners heal and grow together.

In EFT, we understand that emotions are not just a byproduct of human experiences. Instead, they are personal truths on how we make sense of our experiences.

When couples face disconnection, the unexpressed longing and sadness from isolation often cause the most pain. However, these powerful emotions can also be the key to restoring the connection between partners.

Through our compassionate guidance, we help couples use this emotional vulnerability to reconnect.

Once that bond is restored, it becomes a strength to face the stresses and challenges of life. With this renewed emotional security, couples are empowered to solve their own problems, fostering more profound understanding, resilience, and growth in their relationship.

What to Expect During Couples Therapy

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you can expect a supportive, structured approach to foster healing and growth.

Treatment typically consists of 8 to 20 weekly sessions, depending on your unique needs.

Here’s an overview of what you can expect throughout the process.

Key Steps in Couples Therapy:

Taking note of relationship history and observing interaction patterns:
Your therapist will start by understanding your relationship dynamics and how you interact with each other.
Identifying the most pressing issues:
Together, you and your partner will pinpoint the fundamental problems affecting your relationship.
Uncovering unspoken fears and insecurities:
The therapist will help reveal the underlying fears contributing to negative interaction patterns.
De-escalating emotional reactivity and distress:
Initial sessions focus on reducing tension and calming heightened emotions to create a safe space for communication.
Recognizing and responding to emotional needs:
Couples learn how to better understand and meet each other’s emotional needs.
Restoring a deep emotional bond:
In the second stage, therapy aims to rebuild a secure emotional connection between partners.
Creating security and vulnerability:
The goal is to help partners feel safe enough to share their vulnerabilities and support each other.
Reframing negative behaviors:
The therapist actively works to reframe behaviors like anger or withdrawal as efforts to seek connection rather than seeing them as harmful actions.
Consolidating progress with new solutions:
Final sessions focus on resolving lingering issues and implementing healthier ways to handle future conflicts.
Practicing connection during difficult times:
Couples learn how to stay connected and comfort each other, even during challenging situations.

Throughout the journey, our couples therapy in Spokane is designed to help you and your partner develop lasting tools for a healthier, more connected relationship.

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Frequently Asked Questions

What is the success rate of couples therapy?

At Spokane Counseling Hub, we believe in the transformative power of couples therapy. Studies show that 70-90% of couples find therapy highly beneficial in improving their relationship. Nearly two-thirds of couples also report improvements in their overall physical well-being. Success rates are closely tied to the commitment and number of sessions—so the more you invest in your therapy journey, the greater the potential for long-term, positive change.

How effective is EFT for couples recovering from Affairs or Attachment Injuries?

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT or EFT) is one of the most effective approaches for couples to heal from betryals, infidelity, and injuries. Therapists are trained on using Attachment Injury Betrayal Model (AIRM) within the scope of EFT, helping couples heal from the injury. Every move counts and the therapist should be extremely knowledgeable and experienced with ruptures. At Estes Therapy, we train our therapists on how to work with these painful times and each move to improve the relationship.

Is affair couples therapy worth it?

Absolutely. While the average cost of couples therapy may be over $300 a month, 94% of couples say it’s worth the investment, and 83% consider it a top priority in their relationship. Many couples who stop therapy do so because it has successfully helped them achieve their goals.

Should we meet every week or can we go every other week?

When couples first start counseling to address a betrayal or rupture, we recommend starting therapy every week. We call this the “triage phrase” where we stop the bleeding and help couples de-escalate (calming down the nervous system and relationship). Once some movement has been made, the therapist might suggest every other week when the couple is ready.

What happens in affair counseling? What should I expect?

The therapist will help calm down the nervous system for both people, help create safety to start the trust rebuilding phase, assist in a full-disclosure, and guide the couple through Attachment Injury Repair Model (AIRM) counseling. The therapist helps through each stage of repair and rebuilding trust.

Ready to Rebuild trust in your relationship? Schedule an Appointment in Spokane, WA, Today!

Are you ready to rebuild trust and heal from the traumatic experience? At Spokane Counseling Hub, our therapists are here to support you with couples therapy designed to create lasting change. Schedule an appointment today to navigate your relationship toward healing, growth, and a more fulfilling partnership.

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